The old flame

I have been sucking on rage
                    like a Jolly Rancher
                    all day-

They say
sucking calms coughing
                        fits, since we cannot do both
simultaneously.

The sun is blazing behind
                               the thunderheads
                               making the air tepid-

Did I mention the fire
                        coursing under the skin
                        causing the concrete to ripple
                         and fingers to spark?

Steam smolders in pillars from atop fences
as if the candles
were blown out.

Love and Hate, like thermodynamics,
                          compromises

I stand in between
with my lips stained red,
             a saccharin taste of cinnamon
that was once my favorite

reminds me
of our in-
consistencies.

Still,
I struggle to breathe.





Painting by Henry John Stock (1853-1930) in Public Domain.

To dwell

I hear the sirens and should be more
alarmed

they do not cease
and I meditate
or try to find the silence
in the thicket

of noise, nerves, signals,
cymbals
and flashing red lights.

Meanwhile,
the wind was howling outside
loose things slammed into each other
and the panes quivered
in their sills.

I thought of somewhere
life being whisked away
and let a fear
inside.

I stared at the door
but did not leave
knowing this
would be the death of me.


Painting by Paul Cornoyer, 'The lights in the window' c. 1910 in Public Domain. 

Out-sourcing AI

Of all the books
I have yet to read
There will never be one in the stack
About feelings.

I am a woman. I get these.

F equals M, where F are feelings
And M is motive, unless F equals female,
And M is male, then the former is
Greater than, by approximation.

Genius is not for men alone.

Of all the bizarre curiosities before us,
The greatest Being
Metaphor,
We still don’t know what it is for,
Why we stretch and try not to bounce
trying not to tear truth
from tendon.

It is our tendency to compare that
Distinguishes us, leaving insecurities
like these
all the more prone
To poetry.

The most challenging equations are simply
unsolvable
by a rational mind,
they are Resolved by process,
dissolved by filtration and expulsion,
whereby insight gains a greater perspective
than the outline,
unlike container.

Silence is simply choosing not to say.

That volume,
we hear,
is the best reference
to cite.

There was nothing more to see
that was considered
Tragedy,
so I read
Science or programming.



Photograph by Eli DeFaria elidefaria [CC0].

Homo-stasis

Let me be beautiful-
but not so much so that it makes me
ugly to others.

Let me know more
than everyone else,
but not so much
that I am to blame
(for everything).

Let me be plugged in
but not all the time,
because it weakens the
battery.

Let me love water
but not so much
I drown myself
for want of it.

Let me take in all
the air,
more than enough
to hold inside.

Let me read every word
that means something
to someone,
let me hear
all the wisdom
that may be
profound.

Let me love.
Let me live.
Let me love life
but not so much
I fear death
for the love of
wanting it.


Painting by Matthias Stom [CC0], 'Old Woman Praying' c. 1630's-40's in Public Domain.

Episodic

My dreams had something (important) to tell me
last night.
And on the rare occasion the
Sandman sits down,
crosses his legs
and heart,
promises not to take more than a
Soul, tells a story, and
I get up
before he can get to the point-
of dreaming...

You know, some people believe that dreaming
is reality and the Real World
is make-believe,
comprised of the stories we tell
Ourselves-
True enough
to imagine.

Have you noticed that some people
live for their dream
even when they don't understand
its language.

If we dream we have it All
and get it,
would losing it
become a dream?

Between shades of light and dark,
shadow and body,
we collect impressions of what time it is,
subconsciously we know
all the has been dreamt before.

The point of the dream
the Sandman said is
that it never ends with
Us.

Painting by Franz Marc, 'The Dreaming Horse' c. 1913 [Public domain].

Miss Demeanor

Rather than
Not being good at
Anything,
I mistakenly over-
heard
People reading
The writing
I left on the walls
And instead of calling
It graffiti

They said it was
Good, they called it
Poetry, they read my
Name
and it became an
Accusation.

 Painting by Pompeo Molmenti (1819-1894) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons.

The flavor of feelings

That horrid taste
is due to
the guts rotting,
turning sour
was like love
mistaken for instinct,
untraceable poison,
it seeps,
she weeps
and feels like the weak one
shaking under
the world.

But no.

That which once
quenched-
now toxifies
from inside out,
freely flowing in veins,
through valley's
lies in ruts
and where kisses
once planted
themselves,
now choking on weeds
telling herself
these
hold
the mud away

like selfish deeds

never survive
too long
now
tallest
in the forgotten fields
she chokes
on the view
and knew
this place
inside
was putrid.


Painting by Pierre Bonnard, 'Dining Room in the Country' c. 1913 in [Public domain].