Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts

Saturday, May 28, 2016

In the company of strangers


I thought...
Perhaps she wasn't as lonely
as she thought she was...

Perhaps she wasn't able to see
the difference between wanting
to be thought about
and thinking she was wanted...

She was perhaps mistaking
that forgotten feeling
for need...

I thought
being alone
this long, intentionally
she would see, she shows me
her life had been precisely the way
she wanted
it to be, in gratitude for solitude...

I thought wrong
she said she wanted a man
more than she could stand
since she had not planned
for the golden years
or for the gold she knew
she was due...

She was sure
after all those silver lined years
she still had insecure fears
and had forgotten all about
how much
she thinks of herself,
and what she wants.
She is all she will ever need...

A lone she
in a crowd of couples.


Image by Jurij Ĺ ubic [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons.

Thursday, March 24, 2016

Fear Fiends


If every single one of us
stopped right Now-
pointing aim and angle-
no longer letting out the line
tightening the drag
on those baiting fear
would schools be safe?

If every personhood
could forget they ever saw terror
we could forget its name and
claim for attention and mention.

If we remained strangers
violence would be candy
that decays our good taste.

If all of our hands were clean
we could touch without harm,
and move without touch
yet the lines are long
and gloved with grime.

If we knew how to weild love
without fear of rejection
violence would be in vain.

This stress has made a bloody mess
of bones to pick and bodies to bury.
We have come weak with atrophy
choosing wealth over value,
terrified by the tought of loss.

The fear we put here
as bearers of terrors
we make
hearts ache.


Image By Popular Publications (Scanned cover of pulp magazine) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons.


Monday, January 4, 2016

In the Zone (everything flows)


We have been put in our place “Now”
some feel trapped “Here” -in this dimension sandwich-
Between the roof-sphere-sky-bread
the floor-terra-granite-salt-meat.

Chin up, wi-fi buzzes
humming high-pitched all ways
electric energy
flows
Every Where
we insist on Being.

It originates and stimulates
somewhere
too far to hear
below
the lines,
of sedimentary sheets
compressed in ambient ambivalence
resting in a peace of a kind,
we minded and kept in our place,
like calm, comfortable creatures, calculating:

Where is “Here”
No Time like “Now”

with or without Us
life flows
with no End (in-sight).


Image By NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons. Atmosphere of exoplanet taken Dec. 2013.

Sunday, July 5, 2015

Cat's got my tongue



While sitting outside
on the back porch
on a summer afternoon
in my mix-matched
cushioned lawn chair
enjoying a good new book
unsure if the sun will stay
Out.

I relax,
with my feet in the bluegrass.

Though, it's not a book
that you can fly through,
each page is a mental push-up.
You know the kind, I'm sure-
a bicortextual brain strain
with flow charts that clog.

When way up in the sky,
a small Lear jet flies by,
and I sit in its path,
it growls and is too
high
to even notice little me.

My cat joins me,
with her
un-in-purr-upting company
kneading affection.

A little tawny finch lands
on the rock fountain.
He performs his
flappers dance gaily, his aria flawless,
unabashed,
cleanly and
splashfully exits stage left.

We both watch,
she cackles
and I wonder
why the little bird doesn't care
we're both right there,
staring rudely, ogling even
at its feathered tweet show.

And those angry raven parents up in the pine
are screeching at their latest son,
again.
Impatiently, they squawk, he walks up the drive-
they are fed up with him, I know
even though I don't speak crow.
And even now, at full-grown, a juvenile-
He's more than slow,
we think he was dropped on his
egg-head,
that's what I heard they said.

A helicopter hovers around above wide
oval circles, chopping up the sky
like a Chinese chef, banging cleavers.
It is looking
for something or someone specific,
that is why
it's also called an ‘eye in the sky’.
Hovering just above the electric lines
it bangs, beats, and blows too low, unpleasantly.
Calmly, my cat licks her butt,
unafraid, she knows,
this flying heap of a beast
is just a loud hunk of metal made
by mere man, outside toys.

The leaf blower next door
dies down,
settling the matter
of fences and foliage,
spreading the abundance, she perks her ear
at the trembling leaves trying to run and hide.

From Inside
the deafening sudden thick silence
a grumble,
a rumble grows…
My cat jumps up
on her pads.
Looking up-she crouches low.
In a flash I realize-
it is thunder
and I wonder,
how she could know
to be scared,
although
the crow
still stands stark still, crookedly.
After a brief flash , I decided, I will go
hide
inside.

Now my cat is buried deep
under the bed
where she fled
just as soon as the monsoon
drum rolled into town.

Now wide-eyed and with electrified hair
I think the whiskers may be overkill.
How she chooses her fear
not by what she hears
but by what it comes from…
She is not so dumb
even without a

She has no fear for what is Man-Made-
cat's got my tongue,
in cheek,
I peak outside and reopen the book,
Index finger smugly tucked inside.

The next chapter
is on

‘Natural Selection’.




Composed 7/5/15.


Image By Andreibanc (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons.











(Bone pile)

My lips are sealed with  The caulk of deaf ears. Born for this. Lessons to be learned as chapters Turned  Over, like how to read our bodies ...