Theoretically
if someone showed me
the Future
and said This or That
We both know we'd go with
less pain
We go on
without knowing which is which
The will
yours-
the will see-after
which was worse.
This way
we suffer the same fate.
Painting by Pietro della Vecchia, 'Fortune teller reading the palm of a soldier c. 1626-1678 in Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.
Keep going
an hour longer than you think you can...
Strength
is not how heavy the load
or capacity
to measure up
against the weary
whose Joy
dwells in Nothing-
of want
Everything back,
as though undo was a direction
from undone.
When Lost;
the Way, the Hope, the Time,
the trust
the will, the want, the why-
The sun rises its warm cheek
lighting the low flame
of a fresh poppy
bursting through the winter mud.
Anyway the next step,
the next moment
finds me
empty and lighter and
unable to grasp ahold
of any-thing-any-body-any-way
right or left
or stay
strong long enough
to make sense
of Beauty.
Painting by Auguste Allongé (1833-1898), 'A Walk in the Forest' c. 1873 in Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.
Distinctly the pad of her hand
the inside of her thumb
tapping like a tambourine
white dust exploding upward
each solid strike
and dare ask
why do you do that Grandma?
She liked wearing an apron,
To make it all smooth and loose
or something like that
she said.
The white powder
was not flour
on my parents' kitchen counter
back then the oven made
TV dinners
better than the microwave.
And as I sift
through the coarse grains
of the collapsed sandcastle
of my own making
where I grew into
adding on and adding on
but built too close
to the tideline-
there was nothing
softer than flakes of carbon and gold
no solid memories endured
the crashing
like white shells
of me.
Painting by Granville Redmond, 'Talk at the beach' c. 1931 in Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.
Chest
like vault
or treasure keeper-
holder
as in Heart
or locket, like a lockbox
fitted with skeleton key-
hole-
simply very heavy
and something
sounds
broken
inside.
Unable to lift alone
as pallbearer in the past
I feel the dead weight
familiar remembering
without seeing
This must be why
we bury our dead
in wooden chests such
as these
likewise.
Photo credit: Harris & Ewing, photographer, taken 1925 in Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.
As if I was taken for a ride
without asking for a one-way ticket
wherever not Home
As though it were a nice car
so it meant some safety built-in
As it was
my car
all along
And I let a drunk drive
which explains the carnage
and typical manner
of walking away unscathed
as though blood diluted without alcohol
creates a cushion
in impact-
In fact
the driver always walks away
with a death sentence
that ends
with a sober
period.
Photo credit National Archives at College Park, taken c. 1970 in Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.
The way the sea lion
thrusts its slick body
into the ink stain
cloud of fish-
snagging perhaps one
or two
feels successful-
As does the damsel dragonfly
darting into plumes of gnats
dissipating like dust motes
in the slanted October sun
devouring one at a time
determined to dine until dusks end.
The jumbo jet pierces the jeweled
sky, stirring low sounds and tearing
a hole above
carries bodies
aimlessly, defying time and gravity
yet the traveled disperse
undone.
For just one
the chase was everything
but effort
whereas above,
so below,
there was always more
or less
grace
with a predator
and its prey.
Painting by David de Coninck, titled 'A peacock, turkey, rabbits, and cockerel in a landscape' c. 1659-1701 in Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.
As in
not first
but alternate
a back-up after
A
Designation
of not
Primary
B sides
after-thought-
empty-blanked
there was no time-
paper-music-words
left
to eat.
Painting credit: Édouard VuillardMadame Prosper Emile Weil at her desk circa 1923. Pastel and distemper on paper mounted on board59.5 x 52.5 cm board; 82.5 x 75.5 x 8 cm frameArt Gallery of New South WalesGift of Margaret Olley 1999.
Water Today, warm raindrops glass blurs, the blurry glassy, sharp sparkles sugar. Behind Evening, it was good. Leaves all turned into shadow...
